Needs

"I need..."

How often do we say these words? And how often do we think about what we are actually saying before we say them out loud?

Well, that sounds a bit more cryptic than what's going on in my head. Be that as it may. What I really want to say is: how often do we actually express a real need?

We don't have too many actual needs, i.e. things we really need to live, if you think about it. Air to breathe, a roof over our heads, enough to eat. These are things that are actually all more or less given in our western society, that is, these needs are met. But we don't live on those things alone.

Things like security, safety (and not only in the financial sense), love, affection and recognition are at least as important for us humans on an emotional level. And these are anything but granted - just spend five minutes browsing any comment sections on the internet.

In places sonorously called "social media", there is a level of aggression, verbal and emotional violence and denunciation that can plunge the toughest dirtbag into a fully grown depression. If we expose ourselves to the public on the internet, there is a great chance that we will be attacked and insulted. By people we don't know. Who don't know US. Who have no active role in our lives, but who for some reason simply don't want us to be well.

Now you might say: I don't care if I'm not liked online, because the internet is not a real place. But let's be honest: who succeeds with that in the long run?

In this context, I have been questioning myself a lot in the last few days. What are my needs? What do I actually NEED? What do I need in real life, what do I need from the internet, ON the internet? In the end, the list was relatively short.

Then I compared it with another list and recorded what I regularly consumed and received from the digital world...

What I quickly noticed was that list no. 2 was a lot longer - and hardly corresponded at all to list no. 1. Conclusion: what I did online and what I needed online, what I did on the computer and what I needed from the various, digital media... these were fundamentally different things.

What did I write yesterday? Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn?

I don't think you can really win much in connection with the internet. But you can learn!

Personally, I don't think much of posting passive-aggressive messages on social media announcing that I'm now turning my back on it all, preferably with a specific date, and at the same time calling for people to get in touch with me if they still want to have personal contact. Simply because I myself have never responded to such an appeal and because I don't believe that having people in my life who behave in this way will get me anywhere.

And I don't plan to say goodbye to Facebook and the likes. I like it too much for that, and every now and then something sticks that is absolutely positive. In addition, I waste so little time on these platforms that it doesn't matter. What I have actively done instead is to first say goodbye to the whole, actual streaming world. Away with the Netflix subscription, away with Amazon Prime, away with Apple Music. Because let's be serious: I really don't NEED all that. They are conveniences, pleasant aids for escaping real reality, depriving oneself of sleep, ruining one's own rest and, in the end, ruining one's own health. So away with them.

I didn't use to have any of that either, and I wasn't any worse off. So here as well, back to the roots?

It's certainly worth a try!

Yours,

Fabian

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